I wuv goldfish!

So I am pwitty sure dat I found a new favowite snack, goldfish. My daddy and mommy were having some a few weeks ago and I was begging wike aways. Dey of course gave me some and I wuv dem. Dey are very good! My mommy took a picture of me wid my head in da bag of dem. She finks it is cute, so she wants me to post if for her.....so dare. So if you are wooking for a tasty snack sometime soon, turn to a bag of goldfish! Yum yummy!!!!!

Me and My Wobsta!

It has come time for me to expwain about me and my wobsta. My wobsta is my bestest friend in the whole world. He and I have a special kind of wewashionship. You see....I nurse on him. I do pwefer to nurse on his head, but anywhere on him is suitable. He is wed and is missing his eyes because I took dem off. Sometimes I just take him and bwing him up to my mom and daddy's bed and start sucking on his head. He doesn't mind doe cause he knows what his purpose is. My mommy got my wobsta at da dollar store before I was even born. She fought that some kids she was taking care of would wike him, but den I came along. I was going around the house taking dings dat I wanted to have for myself. I saw him sitting dare across da room and I fought, hey I wike da wooks of him. So I stole him from da kids.........da west is histowy!